Summer cold, summer hot, summer Olympics

I've spent most of the last four days shut up in my apartment, avoiding the oppressive heat and trying to kick the cold I brought back from Iowa. I took a sick day and everything! Happily, this has coincided with my acquisition of HBO (the better to watch Aaron Sorkin's new show The Newsroom) and, thus, HBO onDemand, so I've watched the entire first seasons of Girls, Veep, and Game of Thrones. But you know what else was on all weekend?

The OLYMPIC TRIALS, that's what. And, well, you know how I feel about the Olympics. It's been exhaustively documented here and here and here and, wow, I really write about this a lot, don't I?

Anyway, the diving and track-and-field trials were this weekend, and the swimming (my favorite!) starts tonight and runs on NBC in primetime all week, with some gymnastics thrown in for good measure. These are particularly important, as I must find a new Olympics boyfriend, since my longtime love Aaron Peirsol has retired. Ryan Lochte is in the running (and I don't yet know whether Pieter van den Hoogenbandenbergenwhatever is competing), but we need to see who else is out there.

Luckily, the first full week of the Olympics is during our family beach week, which means I don't have to worry about it affecting my sleep cycle (and job performance) as much this year.

What about you? Do you prefer the winter games (ski jumping! figure skating!! short-track speed skating!!! biathlon!!!??!) or the summer (swimming! gymnastics! diving! decathlon!)? I can never decide.

The Life List: Sweet Caroline

So you know what's awesome?

Boston. Boston is awesome.

I like cheese = Gonzaga for the win

If this Facebook conversation is any indication, my old high school pal and I have different approaches to filling out our NCAA tournament brackets.


Jonathan: Printed out RPI, SOS, Pomerory rankings. Going to make the perfect bracket!
Me: Sounds complicated. I mostly just pick based on which mascots I like best and who has the prettiest school colors.
Me: Or which school names I like (i.e. Gonzaga reminds me of gorgonzola, which is delicious cheese). Which might explain why I rarely do well in my office pool.
Jonathan: Your bracket will probably be much better than mine.

Very important topic

Forget Qaddafi, Charlie Sheen, and the potential government shutdown.  I know you've all been waiting for my thoughts on the Most Important News Item of Our Time or At Least This Week, which is that Hines Ward--Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver, Super Bowl MVP and two-time champion, and owner of one knee-weakening smile--is going to be on the new season of Dancing with the Stars.

I know, I can't believe it either.  This is worrisome, because it means that I am going to have to start watching the show again.  I gave it up a couple of seasons ago (in favor of So You Think You Can Dance, admittedly) because it was just too much of a time commitment.  It is, in fact, rather like American Idol in that way--multiple hours per week, a results show that is filled entirely with fluff until the last four minutes when they reveal who has been cut, and "very special performances" by artists of varying levels of talent and contemporary relevance (dancers from Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater, yes.  Michael Bolton?  I think not).

Anyway.  Athletes generally fare well in the competition--witness the three Olympic gold medalists who have won: Kristi Yamaguchi (gold medalist in figure skating), Apolo Anton Ohno (multiple medalist in short track speed skating), and Shawn Johnson (gold medalist in gymnastics)--and of course recent Olympic gold medal figure skater Evan Lysacek, who came in a very close second this last season.

Football players, current and retired, are nothing new on Dancing with the Stars, though their talent level has varied widely.  Emmitt Smith won Season 3 (controversial though it was), Jets linebacker Jason Taylor was runner up to Kristi Yamaguchi in Season 6, and legendary wide receiver Jerry Rice was runner up in Season 2.  They were all quite good.  Retired Raiders and Bucs defensive tackle Warren Sapp even made it to the top three in Season 7, though I maintain that he had no business making it as far as he did.  

So anyway, it could go either way. I will be watching, at least for the first few weeks, because I can't NOT cheer (and vote) for the delightful Hines Ward.

Hines "Twinkle Toes" Ward

Heartbreak hotel

I was home in Tennessee for Easter this weekend.  It was delightful and relaxing, but also a bit odd because I was sleeping in the guest bedroom with my sister.  My grandparents are currently staying with my parents as my grandfather recovers from his knee replacement, and they are occupying both my old room and G's.  So we were in the guest room, and G's boyfriend was on the air mattress in the den, and WOW, that made for a whole lot of showers to coordinate on Easter morning.  Also, G and I are not the most amiable co-sleepers, AND she had a cold, so that was interesting.

The big event of the weekend, though (aside from Jesus, you know, rising from the dead, which is a notable event, and also my acquisition of the Most Awesome Red Shoes Ever--pictures to come!), was the West Virginia/Duke Final Four game.  And since four of the seven of us LIVE in the great state of West Virginia, there were, shall we say, some emotions about how the game went.

It didn't go well, in case you missed it.  It was pretty tragic. And so we all desperately wanted Butler to win the championship on Monday night.  Which they didn't. 

But that's okay.  It was a beautiful weekend, and we ate many eggs and large quantities of jelly beans, and I bought shoes, and a good time was had by all.  The end.

Down with Plushie!

Well, our boy Evan Lysacek got it done last night, and aren't we glad? Who says the Cold War is over. Down with Russia!

I kid. I have a soft spot for some of the Russian athletes. So: down with Plushenko! I've taken to calling him Plushie. It's far less intimidating. (Unrelated, has anyone noticed how all the "official" athlete photos look like mug shots? Even the very gorgeous women look like hell.)

Anyway, I thought the men's skating was pretty awesome last night. Evan and--my favorite--Johnny Weir skated beautifully.

But. Did you see Michal Brezina of the Czech Republic? Frosted blonde hair, skated to Gershwin's "An American in Paris"? Here he is. Did he remind you of anyone? Perhaps....this fellow? With the frosted blonde hair, who skated to "An American in Paris"....but better?



That, of course, is American Timothy Goebel, who won bronze in Salt Lake City, was ALSO coached by Frank Carol (Lysacek's coach, and formerly Michelle Kwan's), and whom I adored. And while we're on this trip through Olympics past, here's one of my favorite men's performances of all time, by 2002 gold medalist (and, I should point out, Russian) Alexei Yagudin. That was the first year that I remember quads being a factor (he landed two of them, flawlessly), and it was the competition that began my loathing of Plushie.



Ahhhhhh. Love it.

And lastly, apropos of nothing, here's a response to those (who shall remain nameless) who find NBC's coverage a bit, say, sappy:

"Without patriotic fervor and feel-good stories, the Winter Olympics are just a series of options for going down a mountain. That hasn't been interesting since Moses did it." (From Sports Illustrated. Hat tip to Jules.)

Your Olympics moment of zen

Did anyone else feel a sudden urge to transfer their citizenship to Canada while watching Alexandre Bilodeau receive his medal last night? No? Just me?

(I can't seem to embed the video, so here's the link.)

I think Canada might have my favorite anthem of all the countries. I mean, technically I can probably only identify theirs and England's, but still. I got a bit verklempt.

Three days in

I've said this before, I think, but the thing that always amuses me about the Olympics is its ability to make you spend hours watching sports that you would never, ever, under any circumstances care about.

I spent three hours on my couch yesterday afternoon, glued to the biathlon coverage. Biathlon, of course, is the one with the cross country skiing and the shooting. It is not exactly thrilling, I have to say, but oh, the SKILLZ. These guys are racing along on skiis, heart rates presumably through the roof, and then they have to drop to the ground and shoot five targets--each the size of a silver dollar, as the commentators told us numerous times--before getting up an skiing some more. Can you imagine trying to hit a target that size with your heart beating wildly like that? I cannot. It is seriously impressive.

There are also, of course, the sports that are TOTALLY EXCITING, like the short track speed-skating. I cannot get enough. Obviously Apolo Ohno is part of the draw, but also the DRAMA! Did you see that race the other night where he got his sixth medal? The Koreans were going to sweep! But then they crashed! And Apolo and that adorable JR Celski kid medaled! You cannot make this stuff up.

And then last night, bless his heart, the Canadian moguls skier Alexandre Bilodeau brought home Canada's first gold medal on home soil, which may have been even more exciting than when Hannah Kearney won the gold for the U.S. in the women's event the previous evening.

Oh, the drama. Oh, the awesomeness. I love the Olympics.

OH! That reminds me, I never told you what twizzles are. As I was looking up an easy definition just now, I found this handy feature from USA Today, where U.S. ice dancers Tanith Belbin and Ben Agosto show us some twizzles. Now you'll all be able to impress your friends during the ice dancing when you can identify the twizzles. (Can you tell that I like saying twizzles? I do. And, oddly, I now find myself craving Twizzlers. Huh.)

Get excited...

The fun begins! Time to start educating ourselves on Team USA.

Coverage of the figure skating teams, including--finally--a sort-of explanation of why the U.S. only has two entrants in the women's competition, as opposed to three in most of the others

NHL hockey players: Olympians, or no? As my fondness for hockey grows (Go Caps!), I'm getting more and more excited for the Olympic hockey tournament. "Miracle," which I have never seen, is next up on my NetFlix queue. [Side note: I attended the Caps-Maple Leafs ass-kicking game two weeks ago and, by the third period, I was seriously mad that I might not see any fights. And then, when one finally broke out, I cheered. What does this say about me as a person?]

And finally, for your daily dose of flamboyance, here's the ever-glittery Johnny Weir doing "Poker Face" at the US Figure Skating Championships.

T-minus 16!

Next up:
Olympics terminology -- What, exactly, are twizzles? The answer--and why you should care--coming soon.

Heard... (GO TOPPERS! edition)

...last Friday night at the Science Hill-Dobyns Bennett football game, where I unexpectedly ran into two old friends. We composed a personal ad for our quarterback, who was on the field for the entire game.

John: That's our quarterback!
Norman: Number five!
John: He plays offense--
Norman:--he plays defense--
Me:--he likes long walks on the beach and makes a mean lasagna!
John: [pause] What's his name, though?


(I forgot to post this earlier in the week. Was too keyed up by other things, apparently.)

Final Olympic thoughts (for this year, anyway)

Further thoughts on the closing ceremonies:

1) I'm not gonna lie, I got a tad teary during the Kenyan national anthem as they awarded the gold for Men's Marathon in front of 90,000-odd people.
2) Yao Ming is TALL, ya'll. I get tickled every time I see him standing head and shoulders all the other athletes.
3) The replays of various big moments of the games that they're showing at all the commercial breaks are pretty cool, actually. I got all scream-y AGAIN when they showed Jason Lezak winning the men's 4x100 free relay.
4) Well. That was quite a waste of David Beckham's time.
5) Um...please explain how Plácido relates to Beijing or London? I don't understand.
6) I am a sucker for a good montage, I tell ya.
7) Not nearly as good as the Opening Ceremonies.

Two other things I've been wanting to say:

One: Rhythmic gymnastics. I DO NOT GET IT.

And finally, the US men's basketball team. I am not an NBA fan at all, but I have fallen a little in love with these guys over the last two weeks. For all the crap that America's professional basketball players typically deal out, the US men were so poised and supportive of the other athletes and seemingly happy to be there that it was just a little endearing. One of my favorite moments was during one of Michael Phelps' races (I think the final one where he broke Mark Spitz's record) when Kobe and several others were in the stands, waving the American flag and cheering Phelps on with everything they had. So anyway, props to them for a) winning, and b) doing it with class.

Well, Bob Costas is signing off from China "this one last time" (ooh, final montage!!). Tomorrow it's back to my regularly scheduled blogging, so no more rambling about Aaron Peirsol.... Actually, I can't promise that, but significantly less, anyway.

Can't wait 'till Vancouver in two years!

****************************
UPDATE: They're using the theme from Remember the Titans! And I'm a little worried that I know that.

Phelps, Murphy, and Pepe

Well. It's Monday, yet, oddly, I am feeling a great deal of relief. Because, ya'll, it was a WEEK. And then a WEEKEND. And today is the first day in eight that swimming and gymnastics aren't on until the wee hours, so I can go to bed at a reasonable hour. I'm not really sure what I'm going to do with my evening.

After my sleepless (yet fulfilling! go US gymnasts and swimmer-people!) week, I had high hopes of catching up this weekend, though that was not to be. Hence, YAY, it is Monday, and I can go home and go to bed. All week! No late nights!

Anyway, it was a Big Fun weekend. Saturday night were pre-birthday festivities night, including dinner (oddly, even though everyone I know moved this year, this birthday had the highest turnout of any I've had in DC) and post-dinner Olympics-watching. And let me tell ya, there is no better place to watch Michael Phelps break the all-time medal record (and Dara Torres almost win the 50M freestyle) than in a sports bar. People went BALLISTIC. It was like being there live, with the yelling and the GO GO GO!!!" and the "USA! USA! USA!" Big fun. Many thanks to Ed, Val, Brian, Shelley, Nick, Ryan, Becky, Angela, and Harris for the birthday funness.

Then, yesterday, B and I went on a Virginia wine country excursion, sponsored by Murphy and his infamous law. It was a beautiful day, and the view were spectacular, but darned if it didn't take us three tries to do anything. By the numbers:

Vineyards visited: 3
Vineyards attempted to be visited, but lacking visible signage: 2
Random dirt/gravel/one-lane roads traveled due to worthless maps and/or lack of visible signage: A bazillion and four
7-Elevens visited for pitstops: 3
7-Elevens with broken doors (photo to come) and/or toilets, requiring visits to additional locations: 2
"Recommended" restaurants closed upon arrival: 2
Restaurants dined in: 0
Minutes spent in Whole Foods (back in DC) waiting for B to decide what to put in the pasta sauce: 42

That said, we had an enjoyable day, and I have a whole new appreciation for the geography of northern Virginia, which is quite lovely. I'm now looking forward to a nice, uneventful ten days, followed by impending insanity of having Ash, Jules, Miguel, and Jason ALL HERE AT THE SAME TIME. Hilarity will ensue! Madness! Also, probably lots of Pepe. I can't wait.

MY age, in Celsius, is -4

Upon further examination of the aforementioned Dave Barry column, it turns out that he is also blogging about the games (surprisingly not as funny as I expected) and writing daily columns, which ARE, in fact, quite amusing.

This, for instance, sent me into gales of laughter for a good five minutes today:

"China is still winning. The big heartbreak Wednesday was that their women's gymnastics team beat ours, and in the spirit of Olympic harmony, I will refrain from pointing out that, even though the minimum age in that event is supposed to be 16, some of their women appeared to be more like 7. Maybe the Chinese calculate ages in Celsius. Or maybe it's like the Silk Market bargaining system, where the official minimum age is viewed as merely an opening offer. In any event, I see no need to make allegations of cheating, so let's just forget about this whole thing and move on." (From the Miami Herald)

It was the ages in Celsius thing that set me off, although--by the double-and-add-30 rule, that would make their age in Celsius something like -8. It's also possible that my threshold for funny is significantly decreased by the (also aforementioned) sleep deprivation, but I don't think so.

Heard... (work edition)

...at work today
JK (my boss): So you stayed up late watching the Olympics again last night, huh?
Me: How did you know?
JK: You just...look a little...
Me: Exhausted?
JK: Well...yes.

Aaron Peirsol makes me nervous

Well. Banner day yesterday for the Americans, that's for sure. I was all prepared to stay up until midnight--past my bedtime!--to see the men's gymnastics team final, but it wasn't over till 12:30! But the boys were doing so amazingly well, sticking landings right and left, that I couldn't abandon them! So I stayed up, and, consequently, I'm about to fall asleep on my computer keyboard.

Big night for the swimmers, too, with the US collecting three golds, a silver, and two bronzes. My boyfriend Aaron Peirsol (see? isn't he pretty? don't you think we'd have beautiful children??) handily defended his gold in the 100m back and set another world record while he was at it. He's so laid back, however, that he makes me nervous--EVERY time, he's the last one on the starting block (or whatever the thing is that the backstrokers hang off of under the starting block, and EVERY time he's the last one to get into starting position. He just takes his sweet time, not an urgent bone in his body, and I'm yelling at the TV, "DUDE! You're going to MISS the START of the RACE!" And then I smile like an idiot during the medal ceremony, every damn time. I am a loser.

Anyway. It occurs to me that if you're not interested in my (obsessive?) musings on the results of various sports, you may be a tad bored with me for the next couple weeks. The Olympics have taken over my life, and I don't see that changing much until they're over. Just warning you now.

And THAT is why I love the Olympics

HOLY MOTHER OF PEARL, did you people see the men's 4x100 freestyle relay???? I was yelling like a crazy person.

I am thrilled that most of the swimming finals live, but I am going to lose so much sleep staying up and watching all this stuff over the next two weeks!

Three very exciting (to me) pieces of news:

1) I am leaving for the beach To! Mor! Row! I know you are as pumped as I am. I went to the library yesterday and stocked up for the trip (3.5 day vacation? 6 books, not including audio for the car ride). This year's Book En Route for my 18-ish hours in the car? The Lord of the Rings. I will either be enthralled or I will reeeeally regret it. Time will tell.

2) The Olympics start in FOUR DAYS, folks. Opening Ceremonies are on Friday night, and I will be taking time out from my packed schedule of reading and hammocking to watch them.

3) Washington Post sportswriter Dan Steinberg's Olympic blog, the Beijing Sports Smog (get it?) is up and running! (You may remember that I wrote about his Torino blog a month or so ago.) If the Torino blog is any indication, the Beijing Sports Smog will not disappoint (unless you're looking for actual coverage of the sports, in which case you may want to look elsewhere).

Countdown to 8.8.08*

So. You may have heard, particularly if you've watched any of the NBC networks over the last bazillion months, that there are some Olympics coming up this summer.

I am, to say the least, quite excited about this. I love the Olympics--winter and summer, I'm equal opportunity--and I cannot get enough of them when they are on. I love the theme song, I love the obscenely overproduced Opening and Closing Ceremonies, I love that the world becomes consumed not just by the glamorous sports--gymnastics or skiing, for instance--but also sports that rarely see the light of a media camera, like archery and biathlon. I love the cheesy/inspirational interview/video/photo montages of the athletes. I love how I become thoroughly attached to random athletes who I have never heard of before and will likely never hear of again. I love how Bob Costas, with his almost hilarious sense of solemnity and gravitas, inspires such divisiveness amongst my friends. (Love him or hate him? Discuss.)

During the 2002 Winter Games in Salt Lake City, I was a freshman in college and spent hours glued to the TV at all hours of the day. Every evening, my roommate would come home and I would give her the day's US medal count, as well as the highlights. (Incidently, the '02 Olympics are also linked in my mind to a massive drug bust on our university campus--it was the night of the women's figure skating long program, when Sarah Hughes came out of the woodwork to win the gold--including the dorm room next to Ash's. It was a dramatic evening, both onscreen and off.)

Anyway, I spent much of this weekend watching the Olympic Trials (diving and gymnastics) and am suitably pumped. You can expect many blog posts in the coming months (starting on or around 8.8.08!, most likely). However, I would also like to introduce you to Dan Steinberg, who is a sports writer for the Washington Post. He blogged on the 2006 Olympics from Torino, and it was one of the most hilarious blogs I have ever read. It consisted primarily of musings on a) cheese, and b) the New Zealand ("Kiwi") curling team. These may not sound like the makings of a funny blog, but I spent the majority of February 2006 stifling my laughter so as not to disturb my office cube-neighbors.

I don't know yet whether Dan will be blogging from Beijing--I have emailed him to ask, we'll see if he responds--but I offer you Tales from Turin. I encourage you to start at the beginning, but you can also skip ahead to February 11-ish, when the actual games have begun. (Also, this is a big DUH, but this blog is two years old, so don't go emailing him.)

*T-minus 46 days

UPDATE (2:15 PM): It DOES appear that Dan will be in Beijing, which I discovered from his regular blog...which I don't read regularly. So, yay.

One*

*(Number of days of 95+ degree heat that I made it through before I put the AC unit in.)

It is hot. Very, very hot. Jules texted me yesterday morning and said "M wanted me to tell you that DC is hotter than FL today! Don't melt. "I was all "Eh, my apartment doesn't get direct sunlight, I can get away with fans only." NOT SO MUCH.

It actually wasn't too bad, until I turned on the oven for dinner and it never cooled off. I spent the evening draped on the couch like a wet noodle. I can handle one hot day, but three months? No way. So this morning--after I went to the grocery store and remembered what air conditioning felt like--I put the AC in the window. Ah, sweet blissful coolness!

And then I turned on the TV at 11am, expecting to watch the last half of the French Open men's final, which started at 9. But! 'Twas the middle of the third set and Rafael Nadal was three points away from defeating Roger Federer. Which he did! In straight sets, 6-1, 6-3, 6-0! I cannot believe it. (I don't think the NBC people could either, since the broadcast was scheduled to go until 2pm, and it was over--ceremony and all--by noon.)

Anyway. I am staying inside with my air conditioning, a book, and the Olympic Trials.